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April 18, 2002
On Call
As she once said, having your significant other be on-call is an exhausting experience. I used to not mind it so much, but recently I've been finding it unsettling. It's probably because I miss him. He's been travelling a lot, and so have I. For people who spend almost every night together, we sure don't see each other much.
We rely on each other heavily when we are stressed out, we find great solace together. This works extremely well, unless we're BOTH really stressed out. Like now. He's on one of his most time-intensive rotations, and I'm at the end of a five-course semester. We're sleep-deprived, travel-weary, over-scheduled. I'm broke. He's trying to get his apartment set up. I'm on pins and needles over a financial aid decision to be revealed on Monday. He's tied up in knots over the fellowship decision. I could go on and on. I want to whine to him, he to me... but we're pressed for time and focused on our respectively over-loaded lives. (My overloaded life, by the way, isn't really over-loaded compared to his. My "needs"? I want to whine to him about this stupid presentation that I'm not ready for because I put it off for so long. His? He needs me to listen to him talk about trying to save the premature triplets whose mother might not survive, the two oncology patients that died today and the little one with asthma who might be brain dead. See? I'm awful!)
We're going away to Italy with his family soon (see sidebar for count-down!), and every time I think about it I am at once overjoyed and overwhelmed. Why am I overjoyed? See the paragraph above. Oh, and it's Italy. Why am I overwhelmed? Because that means I only have X number of days (see sidebar for 'X') to get all of my work done, find an internship, possibly find a place to live for the summer, sub-let my apartment, and pack.
What happened to spring, careless and free? Isn't there somebody I can call about this?
Posted by shannon at April 18, 2002 02:08 AM | For related posts:
Comments
don't talk yourself into the my worries aren't real trap. i've been there, and it just explodes on you later.
Posted by: nita at April 18, 2002 03:00 PM
thanks, nita. i don't usually do it, but sometimes in the middle of the night when i'm stressed out i find something (else) to obsess about. and 99% of the time, i'm done with it by sun-up.
Posted by: Shannon at April 18, 2002 07:38 PM